Not satisfied…

I have woke up one day and wondered if I am really living the life I really wanted. I admit it; I had done things that end up satisfying other people, and not my self. I had made decisions without understanding the real meaning of it and even risk with it.
I’ve took up a certain course in college because of my friends are also taking up that course and because of the limited options to decide.

I have done things that other people would just reject and actually ask me why I have done it. But no one ever knows that it’s not what I really wanted to do. I feel that I go through life regretting why I haven’t done this and that.

Now, I am about to say farewell to the things I am accustomed to. I am about to graduate, but I fear the graduation day and I not feel that I am graduating; it is because it’s not the way I wanted to be.

I wanted to b able to go back and take another course I really wanted to be my profession. I know it would take time, sacrifices, effort and more effort to realize this. I want to make a straight path of my life and be able to right the wrong ones or, maybe even wrong the right ones.

I cannot be a college student for the rest of my life. But, I want to extend this to fulfill and satisfy myself, and realize the life I dreamed. But some say “Ideal life does not exist”. They are wrong for we are the one who makes life ideal… and in the end, in one-way or another as the quotation states - it’s still me… “The master of my fate and the captain of my soul”.

I will create my own world wherein I am the master and wherein I can kick-off butts…


jhay said...

you're not alone brother! I myself made some pretty crappy decisions before and it really screwed things up, but hey, the beauty of it is, there's always tommorrow where we could start something new again. Congratulations on you coming gradutation!

rak en rol!

mariel said...

true, true.. you should live your life the way you want it to.. live not the life others want for you. only you can make yourself happy. :)